The Miller Lite Girls and the Middle East

Brian is camping with the boys in the middle of the woods. They are roasting the 20-inch trout they caught in the river earlier in the day. The crickets are chirping and the woods smell allive. "It can't get any better than this, guys," he says as he pops a top and takes a cool refreshing sip of Miller Light. But he is wrong-- the woosh-woosh-woosh of helicopter blades suddenly come into range. The boys look up at the black sky as the chopper roars into view and hovers overhead. An entire squad of super-smart busty beautiful bikin-clad women climb down a rope ladder, led by Melissa and Monica. More women are parachuting from the sky. They have brought coolers of beer. And steak. It's party time. All is right with the world.

On the other side of the world Iraqi families are being compensated as much as $5,000 for "civilian damage." Such damage includes burned-dead wives and dead children, cluster-bomb faces and severed limbs, blinded eyes but open memories of watching your family burn to death and bleed to death and plead with death, having no way to stop the killing. They stand in long lines waiting to talk to someone. No young nervous military captains will be coming to their homes to apologize--they don't have homes after this war. They must come to a white room with florescent lights and listen to the pale captain choke back the lump in his throat and struggle to say "I'm sorry," in poor Iraqi language and then hold out his hand to give them some green paper bills. The military does not keep a list of the civilian wounded because (quote) "it's just not policy." They have no idea how many people they have killed until the Iraqis come to tell them--"look, look what you have done! Look at my grief! My life will never be the same. Don't you see? I've lost all that I have loved."

I hate war.

Dr. New says that war is inevitable--created or avoided only because of the will of man. He say's it's about preserving manhood and honor. I think it's about power and greed. An ego trip. Being the best. Ruling the world. "If we didn't do it, somebody else would, and they'd do a much worse job," seems to be the prevailing argument. I can't say I disagree, but I have to have a little faith that constant war is not inevitable. Everyone seems to think they would be a better world-ruler than all the rest. They all think that they deserve the throne. We are still having the divine fight over kings. The war of the roses hasn't ended--the kingdom has expanded to include the territory of all the earth.

Why? Oh why can't all the world be happy and have nice things? Kiss each other when unfortune strikes and find love inside security?

Why do we seem to be nothing more than over-evolved animals slugging it out with our claws and our jaws, fighting over food?

Witness this army of such mass and charge
Led by a delicate and tender prince,
Whose spirit with divine ambition puffed
Makes mouths at the invisible event,
Exposing what is mortal and unsure
To all that fortune, death, and danger dare,
Even for an eggshell.

--from Hamlet


I think I will go party with the Miller girls while I still have the chance.